Yup, after two weeks of silence (of sorts) from blogging I’ve returned to posting the usual.
Well things just got out of control for me due to several things that made me stop posting. I needed a break away from blogging to take a refresh and take a break. Constantly doing the repetitive cycle of making posts can fell daunting, it does get to you eventually.
So taking a step back and focus on editing drafts now and again was good change for me, as I had more time to get blog posts written up that I wouldn’t usually have time for.
Other reasons for my absence was due to the fact that I wanted to go outside more. After staying inside with barely much exercise going outside has made me uninspired and lacking the fresh air needed to think clearly. When the lockdown restriction on exercise was changed to unlimited in the U.K., that was when I wanted to do more outdoor exercise (following government guidelines).
None of my friends have contacted me during the pandemic. A few haven’t really contacted me much in months or years, last we saw each other was at P16 (these guys I don’t blame as we’ve quite far apart from each other today with our own lives). But my only contact with a friend who lives near me (or was a regular contact from time to time) has not said a word to me. I won’t go into details on the complexity of our friendship, but let’s just say I’ve been let down so many times (and at one time being tricked despite my feelings being very clear on the matter) that I don’t care about him anymore.
I feel like this pandemic has given me time to reflect on things like friendship. It’s made me realise that I need to move on and find new friends that are my equals. I’m at the age now where I’m not bound by those that I call friends that want to shape me as their biased agenda or opinions. I’ve grown to see that I can be capable of being a better person without being put down, feeling below said persons ego and having to be reminded of my emotional faults when said person can break said rule for themselves.
I need people that I and they can see as equals who I don’t need to agree with, but respect them for their individual opinions and decisions.